When you rationalise and understand things that painful or confusing, they lose their destructive power.

We weren’t born hating any part of ourselves. Self hatred is a lie. Think about it. Its utterly ridiculous. Its the hatred, bile and the criticism others have given us we have believed and subscribed to. Its derived from what others have said and done, and what the world at large tends to think about stereotypically. Those feelings aren’t yours, they are someone else’s insults, neglect or cruelty you have been gullible and dumb enough to believe. Yes, no cuddle for you here. You are gullible., not worthless. You assumed they were right and let it sink into your heart without questioning or resisting it, and now its a program in your head. They say auto-immune diseases such as cancer and/or thyroid dysfunction can be traced back to self-hatred.

Ultimately all social mental illness comes from 2 root principles: a) the need to feel loved, and b) the inability to face and deal with problems.

The most revolting and pustular vanity i’ve personally heard was from one girl who “chose” anorexia nervosa over bulimia simply because the throwing up can ruin tooth enamel. I nearly had to go to the toilet to throw up myself. The other incident that comes to mind was a retard girl at a party pretending to be unconscious from drink and her idiot willing drama-queen conspirators calling out an ambulance, the crew of which swiftly left when they exposed her for the lying child she was. Pathetic victim vanity is one very effective way to disgust me very quickly. Between that and stupid fantastists its a close call. What disgusts me is their inability to think or gain any insight.

Sometimes its amusing. I joked to a friend of my sis’ recently that i’d marry her in 2 minutes flat, and her response was typically female: “But i looked awful!“. Why the fuck would i care? Why would my friendship, affection or romantic inclinations be based on your appearance? Why would i judge you on how you look alone? Its dumb, but its what we’re brought up to believe. Beauty is an attractant, but its 1% of the bigger picture.

Allow me to suggest something to those fluffy little darlings who adopt “eating disorders”: you’re not anorexic or bulimic, you are vain. To be clinically diagnosed with either, you must have lost over 15% of your body weight and for it not be due to any other illness, and other medical complications also need to be present. Doctors use this criteria to diagnose it:

1. The refusal to maintain body weight at or above a minimally normal weight for age and height. Body weight less than 85% of the expected weight is considered minimal.
2. An intense fear of gaining weight or becoming fat, even though the person is underweight.
3. Self-perception that is grossly distorted and weight loss that is not acknowledged.
4. In women who have already begun their menstrual cycle, at least three consecutive periods are missed (amenorrhea), or menstrual periods occur only after a hormone is administered.

Vanity is dumb and corrosively asinine. Its the material opposite of spirituality. Obsession with beauty is foolish, short-sighted and always, always a dead end that makes us vulnerable to the evil machinations of others. You might as well prostrate yourself on the pavement and cry for someone to tell you how wonderful or pretty you are. Many people’s lives are constant driving searches for validation, and the trouble is it recurs every day when they wake up, making them repeat the same thing. What they are doing is subconsciously asking others to validate them, and give them the validation they didn’t receive naturally as a child.

The dictionary definition of “validation” is:

val·i·date /ˈvælɪˌdeɪt/ –verb (used with object), -dat·ed, -dat·ing.
1. to make valid; substantiate; confirm: Time validated our suspicions.
2. to give legal force to; legalize.
3. to give official sanction, confirmation, or approval to, as elected officials, election procedures, documents, etc.: to validate a passport.

The dictionary definition of “valid” is :

val·id /ˈvælɪd/ –adjective
1. sound; just; well-founded: a valid reason.
2. producing the desired result; effective: a valid antidote for gloom.
3. having force, weight, or cogency; authoritative.
4. legally sound, effective, or binding; having legal force: a valid contract.
5. Logic. (of an argument) so constructed that if the premises are jointly asserted, the conclusion cannot be denied without contradiction.
6. Archaic. robust; well; healthy.

So the types of question we are asking others to answer in what they tell us, what they do for us and how they behave toward us are the likes of “Am i beautiful?”, “Am i worthy?”, “Am i good enough?”, “Do i have enough?”, “Do you care?”, “Do you want me?”. It would too painful to know we are asking those types of questions directly, but we are asking for them to show us or tell us.

If you cut strips into your arms and then wear a t-shirt so everyone can see, guess what. You are an attention seeker. See a counsellor.

If you’re not happy with the way your body looks, get on a fitness regime at the local gym and change your diet. If you don’t want to do that, you’re whingeing and enjoy the flattery that comes after you declare your supposed ugliness. If you’re too lazy or uncommitted, then shut the fuck up. I hate fat people, particularly the ones who fall in self-indulgent pity and don’t do anything to help themselves.

People who genuinely intend to commit suicide very rarely tell anyone and are in desperate personal distress that they don’t reveal. They are unconcerned with the feelings of others but ridden with the shame of how weak and shameful they feel. Anyone who gratuitously threatens suicide is an attention seeker, or someone who is fluent in emotional blackmail. See a GP, speak to a charity like Mind or the Samaritans and see a counsellor.

Be suspicious of anyone who draws attention to their so-called disorders or hidden angst. Yes, it may be a cry for help, but those who truly suffer from such horrendous illnesses hide them out of shame. They are devious, manipulative and narcissistic, and often won’t admit they have a problem. The ones to watch out for are those that are silent. When a child falls and hits their head, generally you can assume the injury is minor if they are crying loudly. Its when they fall silent you need to worry. This is the true evil of attention seekers - that they waste people’s time and draw attention away from those who really need help.

My compassion for genuine sufferers is broad, but my patience with pretenders is very, very limited indeed. Sympathising and indulging them just rewards the behaviour and makes everything a million times worse. I personally take the position that its better to pierce the bubble and hold up their lies and pathetic emotional diarrhoea to their face like a mirror.

If you know you want help but won’t get it, then sit there and fucking die. Get private medical treatment as the rest of us shouldn’t have to pay to rehabilitate you as a normal human being because you can’t be bothered to make the effort yourself. This may be an alien concept to most, but to put it simply, if you recognise that you suffer from a problem, BUY A FUCKING BOOK AND LEARN ABOUT IT. Research it on the world’s biggest encyclopedia (the Internet), in a library or speak to helpful organisations. You have no right to whinge, complain or do your attention-validation routine if you can’t be bothered to learn about what the matter is, how its caused and how it propagates. You are responsible for you, not everyone else.

Phew. Breathe Alex, breathe.